>>Choosing from Discernment Rather than Preference
Above all, it is critical that you find someone you trust. Someone who makes you feel safe, supported, accepted, and appreciated. Someone you feel would never judge you. Someone capable of holding space — dispassionately, with steady loving presence, and deep empathy. Someone who is familiar with working from a transpersonal rather than personal space. (Again, attraction often overrides our normal discernments in these areas: If we feel compelled, we tend to see what we want to see.)
…If you make sexual attraction your main criteria, you’re just going to live out your old patterns. Your inner discoveries will actually be distracted by outer fascinations…
…Follow your attractions. Follow your enticements. Just be aware of the level at which you are receiving your information. Because the deeper you start, the deeper you’ll go.<<
As usual, following the thread of another’s inquiry uncovers, for me, a deeper level of clarity around what I feel to be true in my practice, my experience.
“She’s Just Not That Into You”
Q: I want to feel sexually attracted to anyone that I let touch me intimately. I’m interested in what you do, but I am not attracted to you in that way. Shouldn’t I find someone else — someone to whom I am sexually attracted?
A: 🙂 Thankfully, as far as I can discern, none of my clients have ever been really attracted to me “in that way.” I say thankfully, because that is not the point of this work! (And, by the way, the appropriateness of intimate touch in my sessions is never presumed.)
Having said that, if you drop the word “sexually” from your question, I would agree: Yes, absolutely — find someone to whom you feel…
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